Monday, December 1, 2008

My Patience Wears Thin....

So as not to give anyone a false impression of my kidlets (remember yesterday when I was so shocked by their angelic behavior at school?), I feel that I should expound on their behavior at home lately. Sometimes I read my blog and think "Gee, it kind of sounds like we are all one big happy family who gets along and never has any problems." Let me be the first to tell you that we do have our problems and our life is far from perfect. My husband and I work hard to make our relationship work. It is not one of those "I met my dream man, fell madly in love, and lived happily ever after" scenarios, and I am sure that he feels the same way about!! Don't get me wrong...we love and care about each other, but having kid's, a mortgage, a mom/wife who is back in school and not working, all cause significant stress to each and every one of us. I guess it is important to me that you all know this, because I have come across several blogs (none that I frequent, so don't worry!!!) where all it seems they write about is how wonderful life is, how uber great their kids are, and how they don't have a care in the world. Just know that because I choose not to bore you with the things in my life that stress me out, doesn't mean that it (stress/life/worry) doesn't occur. :) Trust me...I can bitch with the best of!!!
Back to the subject at hand...Lately, all my kidlets have been doing is fighting and acting like little beasts at home. No...they are not modeling me and their dad, as we don't fight in front of them (we have minor disagreements in front of them, but we don't fight), so I would sure like to know who gave them a pamphlet on "How to Fight 101."
It starts the moment they wake up ,and it continues until they finally shut their eyes. I know that it is just a phase that they are going through, but it is driving me nuts!!!! I feel that at ages six and nine, they have suddenly regressed to two and!!! The most frustrating thing about it is that I can't do anything, because all I do is discipline them. Grrrrrrrr......I DETEST having to be on top of them all of the time, and the only thing that keeps me sane is knowing that this is just a stage, and that it will pass.
Anywho...sorry to rant and rave, but I am just trying to keep it real!!! It is important to me that you all realize that the same cute, little kids who ride horses, go hunting, and get good grades, also yell, scream, hit each other, and give me wrinkles!!!
Now...go have a nice soothing bubble bath, or a relaxing glass of wine, and think of me!! ;)


Breathe said...

LOL. I remember when I just had one child someone told me if I had another one they would play with each other. HA!

Never listen to your mother when she's angling for more grandchildren. I bet she'd have told me they would help with house work too.

I thought you might get a kick out of this (from my humor column) :

Some blogs are like the modern equivalent of the Christmas letter. I remember one year my aunt wrote a letter that was so upbeat I couldn't believe it was the same family who had their daughter committed.

Can you say Denial!?

Laughing Orca Ranch said...

And I was actually on my way for the bathtub with a glass of ironic! hah! Not. hehe!
Great idea, though, but who as the time for that. Maybe the wine will have to do?

No need to explain that you and your family are REAL people with real lives and problems. I don't ever think that I thought anything different. I know we all tend to keep our blogs as upbeat as possible. I just wish that it was also ok to just be honest and more real without feeling like you might be judged or something, if you show that you and your family aren't perfect.

Anyway, my 3 kidlets have been getting on each other's nerves, too. Must be the holidays coming, I think.
It's mostly just one of them that instigates and aggravates the other two whenever he joins them. I think he thrives on the chaos and bad energy and seeing everyone get riled up.

The other day I was walking by the mirror while I was growling at him to 'cut-it-out' for the umpteenth time...and I noticed that horrible 'H' or '11' that Meg mentioned on her blog. Remember?

My kids usually tell me they know when I mean business, because I have the "H" face.


I'm going to be ugly covered with all these rown lines, when I'm old.
Thanks kids! :P

Hugs to you, Melanie!

New Mexico

Melanie said...

Winter-LOL!!! I will have to check out the other site when I get home from school tonight. :) I mean, I love my family and all, but we are far from perfect, and because I only blog about good things, I think that it may give readers kind of a false impression of what our day to day life is like.

Lisa-What??? No bubble bath and glass of wine???? I am afraid that I may be getting the start of the dreaded "H" on my forehead!!!

Cara said...

It's all about power and control. The big money movers and shakers practiced on their siblings and gave their mothers grey hair.

My family is real too. I don't put it in the blog. The Grandmothers read the blog. They don't need any evidence of my inadequacies and unfitfullnes from the one, the other is always looking for a reason to protect my child and hub from me.

I also can't indicate any problems that I might "need help" with. The "help" brings additional problems without actually helping.

I have indicated some of this in my comments on other's blogs, but have had to delete any comments in my blog that reference them.

A small part of my life, though, is perfect!

Fantastyk Voyager said...

everyone has problems. It's okay- no one is perfect.
When my son was small, I would have the church ladies come up to me after the service and tell me, "You poor dear, it's so hard when your son has "ADD". I understand completely." The thing is, he DOESN'T have "ADD", only ENERGY. Boy, kids can sure give life lessons on humility.

Ummm, I'm heading for that wine now! (just kidding! Maybe?)

Natarojo said...

Not a worry nobody is perfect! We all have our ups and downs, our good times and our hardships. Kids keep life interesting thats for sure! I hope to have one or two of my own in the not too distant future.

Now.... about that glass of wine....

C-ingspots said...

Oh boy, what next?? Here I was thinking that Melanie and her family was perfect. My bubble has been popped!! (insert wicked laugh here) :) I love to hear about all the imperfections in everyone's family!!!! Makes me feel so very normal and happy!!! And I tend to agree with Lisa here...blame it all on these damned holidays..grrr is right. I think they put subliminal messages in the tv commercials at this time of year to make us all feel edgy and inadequate - hee hee hee, I'm cracking myself up here...want to hear about some of my other conspiracy theories??? I sound crazy huh?? Think I need to have that glass of wine too - strictly for medicinal purposes don't you know. Anyway Lisa, good luck with the battling sibling kidlets there. Beat some kiddie butt for me will ya?? Stress reduction 101, that's what I'm calling it. :)

Stephanie said...

A stage huh? I could be a rotten little kid while not perched on a horse's back. My brother and I fought like cats and dogs up to the day I graduated and moved out of the house. Hope you don't have to deal with kids like us - but if it turns out you do...take my parents as example.

-Travel Often
-Enjoy Wine Whenever You Can in Good Quantity (or whatever your choice)
-Get a Job Out of the House Hopefully one that Requires Travel
-Make Frequent Use of Kid Sitters
-When No One Will Kid Sit Any Longer Make the Oldest One Babysit (gives em a taste of what they are dishing out)
-Send Them To as Many Summer Camps as You Can
-Ship Them Off with Grandma and Grandpa Whenever you Can

Finally when you do see them make sure you are super duper nice up until the second they start to fight.

I have no idea if that is good advise or not but I turned out ok. Sorta.

Meg said...

Thanks for keeping it "real"sweetie! Loved this post...newsflash...I hate to break it to you, but it doesn't get any better as they get older! It doesn't really end until they move out and you just don't hear them anymore, lol!

My two fight all the time...still and they are grown! I have had many, many evenings where I had to just go in my room lock the door, start the bath and DRINK....AMEN.

Andrea said...

Oh, it must be something in the air, because my two boys are driving me NUTS!!! Thanks goodness for my little girl. Because I don't think I could have handled another boy. The fist fights, the dirt, the yelling, ugh!!

And let me tell you, I have put myself in time out a few times. I go into my room and lock the door and say, "I have to stay in here for 30 mintues." Because you have to stay in for as long as you are old!!

I love my time outs. I really should take them more often. And believe it or not, the kids actually leave me alone. And when I come out, they say, "Are you out of time out now mom?"

So, breathe, and I too hope it's just a stage!!

Andrea said...

OH and I forgot one thing. My husband and I are like you guys too. We forgot our wedding anniversary for the first five years we were married.

Gail said...

Normal!!! Try making them hold hands for a while. Someone is my far past did that and it worked, I just can't remember who.
My grandmother used to switch all of us when we fought, that way she got the one who started it. Needless to say, it worked.

Melanie said...

Don't you just wish sometimes that you could write about whatever the heck you wanted to on your blog??? I know that I do, but I don't want to offend!!!

LOL!!! How embarrassing that must have been for those ladies when/if they found out that your son did NOT have ADD!!!

I'd stick with just that glass of wine if I were you! Glasses of wine can't talk!!!

You crack me up!!! Sorry that I burst your bubble...wanna share a bottle of wine sometime???

LOL!!!! I love your advice! You could write a "how to" manual on parenting obnoxious kidlets...teeheehee!!! You seem to have turned out alright, so maybe I will take a second look at that list of yours!

Oh thanks!!! So you are telling me that there is no hope??? LOL!!!

There have been several times that I have wanted to give myself a!!! Sometimes I think that I should just let them fight, and that they will eventually wear each other out, but that doesn't work either!!!

I have considered doing that! My mom used to knock my sisters heads together (not too hard of course!) when they used to fight, and something about her doing that always made them stop. Maybe I should resort to more old fashioned discipline?

To all-
You guys are amazing!!! Thanks for understanding that I am just a regular woman/wife/mother, with regular woman/wife/mother problems!!!

Laughing Orca Ranch said...

Oh, and I've got a little something for you, too:

A Jewel for you!

New Mexico

Sharon said...

Hi Melanie,
I found you on Gail's blog :) and thought I'd pop by to read about your family.

You made me laugh so hard. I was reminded of the time my daughter at age 2 whacked her 4 year old brother across the back of his head with a coffee mug, sending us to the ER for staples to the skull lol! It wasn't funny then, but I sure can laugh now that they're 14 and 16 years old :)

I don't think any of us have intentions of portraying perfect families.

I think it's more that when there is stress in the household (usually afternoon hours at my home *teens*) then we're just not up to blogging.

By the time we are, we're over the humps of the daily duals and feeling better so we just want to write about the good things as personal reminders that life isn't all that bad, ya know?

I think if any of us had perfect families we wouldn't have a need to blog as an outlet for our emotions.

Hang in there, it will get better one day, or at least that's what I've been told. Mine are 14, 16 and 20, I'm still looking for that day ;)

Every time mine start going for the juggler I tell them, "I can find something more constructive for you to do with your time and my sanity." That separates them immediately because it always means hard labor and dirty chores they do not want to do.

Good luck and God bless you and your kidlets :)

BrownEyed Cowgirls said...

OMG-I have typed so many posts about my dysfunctional family and at the last moment, I chicken out on hitting the publish button. Sometimes it is all about being able to type the frustration out, not necessarily things that I actually want the world to know.

My whole family fights like cats and dogs, but when it is really important we can band together and whoever is on the opposing side had better watch out-LOL. It sure isn't all sunshine and rainbows, but nothing grows without a good storm once in a while.;)

cdncowgirl said...

Left ya somethin' at my blog :)

allhorsestuff said...

ooou, am late in showing up for this...but fear that I can only choose the comment I most eminate =for I have no "kidlets".
Just horselets and catlets!
Oh and the husband...who right now is having a harder time of life than me I won't complain any there.

I second and third Sharon's reply!
And add that you and anyone with children amaze me with the great strength it takes to be sane.

You are doing the best you can and I love the fact that support is so close at hand...others can really help diminish the stress with the constancy life's normal ins and OUTS!

Anyone that has been around the block of life knows that we all put our best foot/face forward here in, it is refreshing to find that the similar kinks bind us together in the neighborhood! We all got the kinks!

I toast to you mellie, with my next glass!

Trail Riding Cowgirl said...

Ah, winter and the kids inside lots! Mine are driving me nuts as well, at three and five they fight from sunup to sundown. Nice to know I am not alone but scary to know it doesn't get any better!
I am drinking hot tea but maybe should hit the wine!

Latigo Liz said...

So with you on this! I know that I get cabin fever with my one child and those of you with more than hat is off to you! Guess that’s why I like my wine. :) And other libations! Only 9 more months until full time kindergarten!!!